Quality or Quantity?
This month, July, is my last month in Jakarta. No, I’m not going from my current company. It’s because my current company will open an office in my *second hometown, Yogyakarta. When I knew that they will open it, I was so sure that I won’t take it. After all, fuck my hometown, I’m having fun here, right? Wrong. It hit me that, compared to Yogyakarta, Jakarta is a worse city to live, hands down. Here, everything is so rushed, everywhere you go there is traffic jam, super dirty rivers, slums, I could go on for seven days and seven night through the list. Why the hell did I just realize this now? Maybe I’m blinded by the hedonistic offerings that Jakarta have, or is it just my ego? Anyway, after it hit me, I was quick to make a decision: on August 1st, I will go back to Yogyakarta, and work from there.
So, last weekend I was busy cleaning up my closet and put some of my stuffs to expedition company’s hands. Oh boy does it expensive though. My things, 9.4kg, from Jakarta to Yogyakarta, IDR 450.000. Damn, that was expensive. Hence I decided to just throw any other insignificant belongings. From business point of view, yes, I was stupid to throw away money like that. But I think that was the correct decision, as if I tried to sell it, the effort would be more than how much those stupid things worth anyway.
One thing I notice after that busy weekend, now that I have so little belongings here: 5 clothes, 2 jeans, 2 shorts, some sport clothings, a smartphone, and a laptop, I’m much more happier this way. I don’t know why exactly though. One of my theory is that I don’t have to worry anymore about things I don’t really care. More belongings (esp. expensive stuffs) are a symbol of wealth in our society. But having so many things makes you really happy? I bet around 80% of our belongings aren’t being used regularly, and be forgotten. Their only function would be if someone ask you about that particular thing, you can brag in their face all day long because you’ve experienced in having it. But, that’s it. Most of our stuffs mean very little to us, and they are just a burden, a dead weight that makes our live miserable.
That thought brings me to this point. What if we generalize the notion of belongings, to not only about stuffs, but also about anything in our life. Let’s take friends for an example. Does having a lot of friend make us happier? After all, that what we are taught to make friends as much as possible by the society. That’s the norm in our social life. But to think about it, we can still be miserable even if we have a lot of friends. Or “friends”, I might say. For me personally, being an introvert that I am, I much much prefer the company of small circle of friends (this one is without the quotes), compared to being in the middle of large social community (“friends”). I will gladly trade this “friend” just to have time with friends that matter. I think this is one thing that the theory of “the less the better”. However, we should take a note, it’s not just “less”, but the “quality less”.
I didn’t say that making new friends is a bad thing and should be avoided, no. I have no problem having social interaction here and there. I’m great at making acquaintances. Maintaining good relationship with other people, after all, is very important in our life, and I’m doing so. However, just like our belongings, sometimes we forget to spend more time and our affection to the ones we care about. We should really focus on things that mean for us.
So the lesson for me is that I should focus more on something or someone that really mean something to me. Not just focusing on something I don’t really care about, just because of social pressure. I will trade large quantity of something to small amount of things that have great quality for me, anyday, 24/7.